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Outwitting Your Kitten with Maryann: Tipping Point

4.02.2013

We've all been there. Your kitten is constantly knocking over your bedroom garbage can to find a toy to play with from its contents, and you have to clean the leftover mess on an almost daily basis. But you don't have time for that! Season 9 of The X-Files is not going to finish itself (though you wish it would--it's the woooorst). You've got important shit to do that shouldn't include cleaning up shit more than once. Once you put stuff in your bedroom garbage can, you shouldn't have to do it again, am I right? Stand up for yourself.

Now, you might think you have a solution. "I know, I'll spray the kitten with the water bottle whenever he tips it over!" But I'm here to tell you that won't work. You can't be watching your bedroom garbage can 24 hours a day! You've got to sleep at least a few of those hours or you'll die.  And no one wants that (except your devious kitten).

Or maybe you thought you'd just put something heavy in the bottom of the garbage can to help it stay upright against your kitten's knocking-over advances. But unless you have a really heavy small thing, it will take up valuable space in your garbage can where the garbage is supposed to go! Excepting, of course, if you often throw away super heavy things in your garbage can already, and therefore don't have this problem.  But then the issue you need to be looking into is why you throw away anything heavier than cat fur and facial tissue in your bedroom trash can. Weird.

No, the real and only solution to outwitting your kitten and his mischievous ploys is to find a receptacle too heavy to knock over! Simple, really.

First, let's take a look at your current bedroom garbage can. Watch how this 3/4 full bottle of wine can easily start to topple it (and did so multiple times before I could take this photo):






You don't stand a chance. You might be thinking, "Just buy a heavier garbage can!" But heavy garbage cans are usually made of expensive materials and can cost up to $70! Paying that much for a bedroom garbage can would be letting the kitten win.

So what can you do? Go to your local home goods store and head to the clearance section of the garden center. Look for a...planter! They're heavy and usually shaped like a garbage can. Perfect. If you can find one that looks like a prop from a high school production of "Into the Woods", even better:


This thing is HEAVY. I know it looks like it's made of light plastic but it is a beast. Just carrying it from my car to the house was a struggle. Here's a show of its strength, featuring one of my latest DIY projects (hopefully I'll get to a post about it), my previously brown and black stool that is now turquoise and orange:


Notice how even the weight of this stool focused on the top edge of the planter cannot budge it!  Success. How many times has my kitten knocked this planter over since I started putting garbage in it? ZERO. Go and do likewise.

2 comments:

jonathan edmund said...

You're AMAZING! Into the woods, it's time and so I must begin my journey!!

loverstreet said...

awesomeness all around!